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Codiekitty · 06-02-2007, 06:38 PM

Just press Ctrl+A.

Spoiler Below

British Military Dude: We are hanging some people for associating with pirates.

Kid: I know a song that everyone else does, I have a coin, and I made a singalong! Please ignore that I have braces.

Executioner: It's funny that I have to prop this kid up on a barrel because the noose doesn't reach him.

Kid: Who am I, anyway, and why am I being executed?

Executioner: Somebody who associated with pirates, because you associated with pirates.

Kid: I am dead, and my coin is bouncing around.

Elizabeth: I am singing the same song the kid who was being hanged was singing. You probably still can't hear or understand the words.

Orientals: That song is taboo. Let us forget about it.

Barbossa: Elizabeth had to come by boat in disguise, but I'm special and can enter just coming down some stairs in my normal pirate clothes.

Singaporian Pirate Leader: I like it nice and steamy in here because it makes my loin cloth smell.

Pirates: We are firing in random directions, because it is awesome.

Will: Okay, Singaporian Pirate Leader, I have a deal. Your end is that you get me a ship. My end is that I need to save my father's life.

Singaporian Pirate Leader: Okay.

Main Bad Guy: I'm having Davy Jones blow up my competition, even though in the last movie it was said I wanted to control him to control the kraken.

Davy Jones: I'm sad. Now I'm angry.

Barbossa: We are in the arctic.

Pirate: I snapped my toe off.

Barbossa: Now it is implied we are sailing through space. Yay, a waterfall!

Nose: I am a giant nose trailing along a white background with a little gray under me. Ooh! A peanut!

Jack: My version of hell is a big desert with so much bloom it turns everything completely white. Of course, this might be heaven for the people who thought Shadow of the Colossus had the best graphics ever!

Barbossa: That waterfall led us straight to Sparrow! Let's go home!

Elizabeth: Daddy!

Barbossa: They won't notice us. We're ghosts to them.

Dad: Oh, hi Elizabeth. I'm dead. I know it sounds like I'm dead because I stabbed the heart of Davy Jones, and whoever stabs the heart takes the place of Davy Jones, and I'm going to drift out here forever, but I was actually killed because I just found out that information. Relieving, no?

Elizabeth: Daddy!

Barbossa: To thwart Main Bad Guy, we will unleash Calypso after we have collected all the cords, like the string of beads that Jack is wearing I am drawing attention to. Actually, I'm not saying "cords", I'm saying "chords", because of the ringing the coins that will unseal Calypso make. Oh, and you've probably never heard of Calypso before.

Witch Doctor: Oh, by the way, I'm Calypso. I'm also Davy Jones' love who broke his heart.

Barbossa: Oh look over here! THIS is why Main Bad Guy wasn't using the Kraken, because it's dead and just so happened to wash up on this beach!

Jack: We've been captured.

Will: I'm backstabbing you, Captain Jack Sparrow!

Singaporian Pirate Leader: Now I'm backstabbing YOU, William Turner!

British Admiral Dude: Now I'M backstabbing YOU, Singaporian Pirate Leader!

Singaporian Pirate Leader: Now Will and I are teaming up to backstab YOU, British Admiral Dude!

Main Bad Guy: I appear to have already collected all but one of the nine pieces of eight. We are assuming that Jack Sparrow has the last one.

Jack: Oh, explosions! My cue to take off!

Main Bad Guy: I have powers of teleporation, and will demonstrate them by going from my office to some ship in all of five seconds.

Jack: I am shooting an army man that looks like you out of a canon so that I can do some flashy moves.

Singaporian Pirate Leader: Hey, Elizabeth, guess what? Remember all that deal with the Witch Doctor hinting she was Calypso? Forget it because YOU'RE Calypso!

Jack: Hm, if I stabbed the heart of Davy Jones, I'd become the immortal king of the sea.

Stab It Jack: We are doing a take on the old Angel and Devil routine from cartoons. I say you stab the heart. You'll be king of the sea.

Don't Stab It Jack: Don't stab it. You'll have to take people to the land of the dead.

Stab It Jack: Stab it. You'll be king of the sea FOREVER!

Don't Stab It Jack: Don't stab it. You'll turn into Cthulhu.

Stab It Jack: Ooh! A peanut!

Will: I'm strapping bodies I got out of nowhere to barrels and tossing them off the side of the boat.

Jack: My breath knocks you overboard.

Admiral: Hi, all! Remember me by any chance? If you don't, don't worry because I'm just here to remind you all that Elizabeth has THREE boyfriends.

Will's Dad: I've gone psycho for some reason.

Admiral: I'm dead.

Witch Doctor: Remember the scene with the Singaporian Pirate telling Elizabeth she was Calypso? Now forget THAT, because I'm REALLY Calypso!

Barbossa: Wait a minute, did this scene come before or after Will's dad stabbing that Admiral?

Witch Doctor: Eh, who's keeping score.

French Pirate: I am a pirate who looks like a mime, because men in makeup are funny.

Japanese Pirate: I am an ugly geisha, because ugly women wearing tons of makeup are funny.

Indian Pirate: I have a really high pitched voice, because men who sound like women are funny.

Pirate with Parrot: As it turns out, the seals on Calypso are actually just random pieces of junk. Oh, the coins that made ringing noises? Forget about those.

Other pirates: We are outraged that Elizabeth, a woman, is a captain. Forget about the geisha.

Captain Hook: Hi, I'm Jack Sparrow's dad, and I keep my wife's shrunken head in my pocket.

Other pirates. We are outraged that Elizabeth, a woman, is now king of the pirates. Forget about the geisha. We will engage in another completely incoherent battle.

Witch Doctor: Oh, Dave.

Davy Jones: Oh, Calyp.

Witch Doctor: Oh, Dave.

Davy Jones: Oh, Calyp.

Witch Doctor: Oh, Dave.

Davy Jones: Oh, Calyp.

Witch Doctor: I WILL DESTROY THE WORLD.

Davy Jones: I HATE YOU.

Jack, Elizabeth, Barbossa: We are marching in a line to make negotiations on some kind of little sand island.

Will: I'm huge.

Main Bad Guy: I have a wig.

Davy Jones: I'm standing in a bucket.

Elizabeth: Our negotiations are this - give us Turner who betrayed and led you to us and give you Jack Sparrow who hasn't done anything really rotten on a while.

Jack: Fudge.

Barbossa: In order to free Calypso, we get her high on the burning fumes from a glass eye, some spectacles, a broken bottle, and various kinds of beads.

Will: My attempt to break Calypso's heart resulted in her screaming incoherently and turning into a bunch of...? Okay, after the avalanche we find out they were crabs.

Pirate with Glass Eye: I have a crab in my pants! It's funny!

Calypso: So yeah, my wrath is some rain and a whirlpool for the Black Pearl and Flying Dutchman to swirl around in on opposite sides and fire at each other.

Writers: We made this fight such an incoherent mess because we knew you'd be too busy trying to follow to notice.

Other Ships: Erm, are we supposed to be in this fight?

Elizabeth: Will, I know we're in the middle of a really confusing and messy swordfight, but will you marry me?

Will: This isn't the time!

Elizabeth: Yes it is! We haven't had any forced attempts at character development and humor in a while!

Will's Dad: I'm still insane.

Barbossa: Hey, remember that kid with the braces who got hanged at the beginning of the movie, or the taboo song he and Elizabeth were singing? Well, we sure don't!

Davy Jones: I stabbed Will Turner and this somehow disgusts Jack Sparrow.

Jack and Elizabeth: Even though we were technically the ones who stabbed the heart, it counts as Will stabbing because his hand was on the knife.

Calypso: Thank you for dropping my love's body into a black hole and getting the Black Pearl out of my whirlpool. Now I will vanish and take my clouds and rain and whirlpool with me.

Will: Now I am the new Davy Jones! PH33R MY CHEST SCAR!

Main Bad Guy: Staring at the camera while a bunch of wood chunks fly around is character development.

Will: Well, either I get my first day on the job off, or it's already been ten years. I will take this time to rub my lips on Elizabeth's legs, which is extra disturbing now that I am undead.

Barbossa: Ooh! A peanut!

Some have mentioned the awesome climax. Maybe there was something there, but after all the nonsense leading up to it, I couldn't take the movie seriously anymore.

Where are these lemmings going? Not the Super Nintendo Super Shire! They know to go to Codiekitty.com now!

06-02-2007, 06:38 PM	#29
Codiekitty Just Another Face in Red Jumpsuit Join Date: May 2001 Location: Lemmingland Gender: Posts: 19,143 Thanks: 121 Thanked 174 Times in 120 Posts Points: 46,816.72 Bank: 3,021,450.74 Total Points: 3,068,267.46 Donate	Just press Ctrl+A. Spoiler Below British Military Dude: We are hanging some people for associating with pirates. Kid: I know a song that everyone else does, I have a coin, and I made a singalong! Please ignore that I have braces. Executioner: It's funny that I have to prop this kid up on a barrel because the noose doesn't reach him. Kid: Who am I, anyway, and why am I being executed? Executioner: Somebody who associated with pirates, because you associated with pirates. Kid: I am dead, and my coin is bouncing around. Elizabeth: I am singing the same song the kid who was being hanged was singing. You probably still can't hear or understand the words. Orientals: That song is taboo. Let us forget about it. Barbossa: Elizabeth had to come by boat in disguise, but I'm special and can enter just coming down some stairs in my normal pirate clothes. Singaporian Pirate Leader: I like it nice and steamy in here because it makes my loin cloth smell. Pirates: We are firing in random directions, because it is awesome. Will: Okay, Singaporian Pirate Leader, I have a deal. Your end is that you get me a ship. My end is that I need to save my father's life. Singaporian Pirate Leader: Okay. Main Bad Guy: I'm having Davy Jones blow up my competition, even though in the last movie it was said I wanted to control him to control the kraken. Davy Jones: I'm sad. Now I'm angry. Barbossa: We are in the arctic. Pirate: I snapped my toe off. Barbossa: Now it is implied we are sailing through space. Yay, a waterfall! Nose: I am a giant nose trailing along a white background with a little gray under me. Ooh! A peanut! Jack: My version of hell is a big desert with so much bloom it turns everything completely white. Of course, this might be heaven for the people who thought Shadow of the Colossus had the best graphics ever! Barbossa: That waterfall led us straight to Sparrow! Let's go home! Elizabeth: Daddy! Barbossa: They won't notice us. We're ghosts to them. Dad: Oh, hi Elizabeth. I'm dead. I know it sounds like I'm dead because I stabbed the heart of Davy Jones, and whoever stabs the heart takes the place of Davy Jones, and I'm going to drift out here forever, but I was actually killed because I just found out that information. Relieving, no? Elizabeth: Daddy! Barbossa: To thwart Main Bad Guy, we will unleash Calypso after we have collected all the cords, like the string of beads that Jack is wearing I am drawing attention to. Actually, I'm not saying "cords", I'm saying "chords", because of the ringing the coins that will unseal Calypso make. Oh, and you've probably never heard of Calypso before. Witch Doctor: Oh, by the way, I'm Calypso. I'm also Davy Jones' love who broke his heart. Barbossa: Oh look over here! THIS is why Main Bad Guy wasn't using the Kraken, because it's dead and just so happened to wash up on this beach! Jack: We've been captured. Will: I'm backstabbing you, Captain Jack Sparrow! Singaporian Pirate Leader: Now I'm backstabbing YOU, William Turner! British Admiral Dude: Now I'M backstabbing YOU, Singaporian Pirate Leader! Singaporian Pirate Leader: Now Will and I are teaming up to backstab YOU, British Admiral Dude! Main Bad Guy: I appear to have already collected all but one of the nine pieces of eight. We are assuming that Jack Sparrow has the last one. Jack: Oh, explosions! My cue to take off! Main Bad Guy: I have powers of teleporation, and will demonstrate them by going from my office to some ship in all of five seconds. Jack: I am shooting an army man that looks like you out of a canon so that I can do some flashy moves. Singaporian Pirate Leader: Hey, Elizabeth, guess what? Remember all that deal with the Witch Doctor hinting she was Calypso? Forget it because YOU'RE Calypso! Jack: Hm, if I stabbed the heart of Davy Jones, I'd become the immortal king of the sea. Stab It Jack: We are doing a take on the old Angel and Devil routine from cartoons. I say you stab the heart. You'll be king of the sea. Don't Stab It Jack: Don't stab it. You'll have to take people to the land of the dead. Stab It Jack: Stab it. You'll be king of the sea FOREVER! Don't Stab It Jack: Don't stab it. You'll turn into Cthulhu. Stab It Jack: Ooh! A peanut! Will: I'm strapping bodies I got out of nowhere to barrels and tossing them off the side of the boat. Jack: My breath knocks you overboard. Admiral: Hi, all! Remember me by any chance? If you don't, don't worry because I'm just here to remind you all that Elizabeth has THREE boyfriends. Will's Dad: I've gone psycho for some reason. Admiral: I'm dead. Witch Doctor: Remember the scene with the Singaporian Pirate telling Elizabeth she was Calypso? Now forget THAT, because I'm REALLY Calypso! Barbossa: Wait a minute, did this scene come before or after Will's dad stabbing that Admiral? Witch Doctor: Eh, who's keeping score. French Pirate: I am a pirate who looks like a mime, because men in makeup are funny. Japanese Pirate: I am an ugly geisha, because ugly women wearing tons of makeup are funny. Indian Pirate: I have a really high pitched voice, because men who sound like women are funny. Pirate with Parrot: As it turns out, the seals on Calypso are actually just random pieces of junk. Oh, the coins that made ringing noises? Forget about those. Other pirates: We are outraged that Elizabeth, a woman, is a captain. Forget about the geisha. Captain Hook: Hi, I'm Jack Sparrow's dad, and I keep my wife's shrunken head in my pocket. Other pirates. We are outraged that Elizabeth, a woman, is now king of the pirates. Forget about the geisha. We will engage in another completely incoherent battle. Witch Doctor: Oh, Dave. Davy Jones: Oh, Calyp. Witch Doctor: Oh, Dave. Davy Jones: Oh, Calyp. Witch Doctor: Oh, Dave. Davy Jones: Oh, Calyp. Witch Doctor: I WILL DESTROY THE WORLD. Davy Jones: I HATE YOU. Jack, Elizabeth, Barbossa: We are marching in a line to make negotiations on some kind of little sand island. Will: I'm huge. Main Bad Guy: I have a wig. Davy Jones: I'm standing in a bucket. Elizabeth: Our negotiations are this - give us Turner who betrayed and led you to us and give you Jack Sparrow who hasn't done anything really rotten on a while. Jack: Fudge. Barbossa: In order to free Calypso, we get her high on the burning fumes from a glass eye, some spectacles, a broken bottle, and various kinds of beads. Will: My attempt to break Calypso's heart resulted in her screaming incoherently and turning into a bunch of...? Okay, after the avalanche we find out they were crabs. Pirate with Glass Eye: I have a crab in my pants! It's funny! Calypso: So yeah, my wrath is some rain and a whirlpool for the Black Pearl and Flying Dutchman to swirl around in on opposite sides and fire at each other. Writers: We made this fight such an incoherent mess because we knew you'd be too busy trying to follow to notice. Other Ships: Erm, are we supposed to be in this fight? Elizabeth: Will, I know we're in the middle of a really confusing and messy swordfight, but will you marry me? Will: This isn't the time! Elizabeth: Yes it is! We haven't had any forced attempts at character development and humor in a while! Will's Dad: I'm still insane. Barbossa: Hey, remember that kid with the braces who got hanged at the beginning of the movie, or the taboo song he and Elizabeth were singing? Well, we sure don't! Davy Jones: I stabbed Will Turner and this somehow disgusts Jack Sparrow. Jack and Elizabeth: Even though we were technically the ones who stabbed the heart, it counts as Will stabbing because his hand was on the knife. Calypso: Thank you for dropping my love's body into a black hole and getting the Black Pearl out of my whirlpool. Now I will vanish and take my clouds and rain and whirlpool with me. Will: Now I am the new Davy Jones! PH33R MY CHEST SCAR! Main Bad Guy: Staring at the camera while a bunch of wood chunks fly around is character development. Will: Well, either I get my first day on the job off, or it's already been ten years. I will take this time to rub my lips on Elizabeth's legs, which is extra disturbing now that I am undead. Barbossa: Ooh! A peanut! Some have mentioned the awesome climax. Maybe there was something there, but after all the nonsense leading up to it, I couldn't take the movie seriously anymore. Where are these lemmings going? Not the Super Nintendo Super Shire! They know to go to Codiekitty.com now! Last edited by Codiekitty; 06-02-2007 at 06:53 PM.