i can has fire

So today after a frustrating session of D&D I went to Walgreen's with my mother for toilet paper. While buying toilet paper we bought this big pack of lighters - the kind with the triggers that you have to hold buttons on to ignite.
When we got home we tested each of them out. I got one with a silver body that emits red flames. Everyone else said they didn't feel too comfortable with me carrying a lighter with an adjustable head. Cretins.
But RED FLAMES. My old lighters only emitted, like, sh*tty match-y bluish flames when they decided "oh hey I'm going to work now!". This one works all the time.
I'm going to name her Sylvia. That's a pretty name for a woman. I don't have a girlfriend, and I sure as hell won't need one now that I have Sylvia. Sylvia and I lit some candles and melted wax away from the wicks because the wicks started to, like, drown in wax after a while.

Then I got bored and poured some wax on my arms. Felt nice.
How was everyone else's day?