Kirby The Guy - VGF

Luigi III · 06-24-2005, 07:35 PM

All credit to sprites will be given in the final episode. NOTE: KIRBY'S GROUP IS NAMED THE PHANTOM DARKNESS.

Episode I: The Phantom Darkness

Alink - VCR Man. VCR. · 06-24-2005, 09:39 PM

sladd54 · 06-24-2005, 09:51 PM

whatever happened to giving GOOD criticism?

at first, it was funny, a few new people eally sucked

but now that there's so many, shouldn't we lower our standars a little bit and actually rate the comics without letting our huge gos take over?

alright, your comic isn't good, but keep trying

don't put the boxes in random places, keep them organized, and make the text a little smaller

Alink - VCR Man. VCR. · 06-24-2005, 09:52 PM

It died with this forum's... Goodness. Yes, that will do.

And how did it start out funny? Role call. AHHAHA, WHAT A KNEE SLAPPER.

It's huge. It stretches the page, thus stretching my face. Or brain. Or mom. OH DISS.

It's got a bunch of different characters that look like crap next to eachother.

The whole comic's role call and other random crap. And then they leave you in a non-interesting cliff hanger.

The stupid Chomp goes Chomp-chomp, and the orange ghost dude goes "He's right". Who's he speaking to? Is the Chomp right? Or is Kirby right that he has a plan? That doesn't make sense.

Yes, I'm in a mean mood now. RAWR.

[ June 24, 2005, 09:56 PM: Message edited by: ^Alink ]

sladd54 · 06-24-2005, 09:57 PM

no, i meant the new people's comics

Glyph Phoenix · 06-24-2005, 10:07 PM

There's way too much blank space and you shouldn't resize characters so much. You have too many characters of too many different sizes.

On the other hand, Roll Call was a pretty good way to name the characters. Now you just have to look at one panel to connect all the characters with their names and text colors.

I'd comment more but I'm still sad from Dylan's comic.

**Dylan** · 06-25-2005, 08:28 AM

^ Hush it, you.

I'm starting to feel sorry for Kirby. Seems that lately he's been featured in comics with poor reviews. Poor Kirby.

~Dylan

Mr.Hammermap · 06-25-2005, 10:13 PM

This guy gives Chomps a bad name. And Kirby. And X-Nauts. And Metal Sonic. And Magus. And Luigi's Mansion ghosts. And Doopliss.
First off, that is a horrible Kirby edit. "I'M GOING TO MAKE A BAD EYE PATCH ON KIRBY FOR NO REASON!" If you're going to use paint effects, give them purpose instead of randomness, and shade them. Also, those are such original names. Seriously, "Mr. Nauty"? Chomp Chomp? ORANGE GHOST?!? And why does the Chomp say "Chomp Chomp"? If you're not going to let it talk, make it say ARF ARf, as they actually say that. And why did the ghost say anything? It didn't make sense. And whats with the mad scientist voice for the X-Naut? ANd if they're rivaling groups, does it really matter HOW you smite your foes, just as long as you do? Whats the point of Magus, Metal Sonic, and Doopliss if they don't do squat? The panels are awful, and why are they stationed at the hub area of Kirby and the Amazing Mirror? And for the last thing I noticed, why are they in an area that is supposed to be a mountain, but they're on a bunch of clouds?
:Spasm: My god I said "And" alot.

[ June 25, 2005, 10:17 PM: Message edited by: Chompmaster: Reloaded ]

Glyph Phoenix · 06-26-2005, 06:47 AM

You'd have to be pretty crazy to expect good things from this comic--it has a lot of problems--but some of the things you guys are mentioning aren't problems at all.

This is the first comic. Some of the characters don't have to do anything just yet.

It's pretty obvious that the orange ghost is talking to the Chomp. This is one of those things where the Chomp says stuff that all the characters understand even though all the chomp is actually saying is "Chomp".

And who says Chomps don't say "Chomp"? They make chomping noises. They're always chomping. They are called Chomps. The chomping noises could be implemented into a rudimentary form of communication. And you call yourself a chompmaster.

And Orange Ghost is an awesome name. A very awesome name. Because if you lined up a bunch of multicolored ghosts some would have crazy awesome names like "Atomic Boo" or such, but then there's the orange ghost called "Orange Ghost". Now that's an awesome name. You can bet that when you look through the comic at all the characters who don't have their original names you'll remember that the orange ghost's name is "Orange Ghost".

I bet Green Goblin never had people forget his name. But then again I guess that's part of the superhero business. You name yourself after what you are or maybe after some kind of weapon. If you're a man and you wear a bat costume you can be Batman. If you're like a regular man, except super, you can be Superman.

Poor Nightshade. Nobody could get that name right.

I never mentioned what a stupid name The Phantom Darkness was. It's not funny like "Orange Ghost".

The eye patch isn't funny though. You better have a reason for that one, Luigi III.

Luigi III · 07-10-2005, 08:08 PM

Quote:

This guy gives Chomps a bad name. And Kirby. And X-Nauts. And Metal Sonic. And Magus. And Luigi's Mansion ghosts. And Doopliss.
First off, that is a horrible Kirby edit. "I'M GOING TO MAKE A BAD EYE PATCH ON KIRBY FOR NO REASON!" If you're going to use paint effects, give them purpose instead of randomness, and shade them. Also, those are such original names. Seriously, "Mr. Nauty"? Chomp Chomp? ORANGE GHOST?!? And why does the Chomp say "Chomp Chomp"? If you're not going to let it talk, make it say ARF ARf, as they actually say that. And why did the ghost say anything? It didn't make sense. And whats with the mad scientist voice for the X-Naut? ANd if they're rivaling groups, does it really matter HOW you smite your foes, just as long as you do? Whats the point of Magus, Metal Sonic, and Doopliss if they don't do squat? The panels are awful, and why are they stationed at the hub area of Kirby and the Amazing Mirror? And for the last thing I noticed, why are they in an area that is supposed to be a mountain, but they're on a bunch of clouds?

Ok. So maybe I shouldn't have matched Mountain with clouds around it, with clouds. But if you hate it so much, WHY ARE YOU HERE?! Geez! It'll get better! And maybe I should get rid of "the mad scientist voice for the X-Naut." And maybe I should scrap the comic and start a new one! In fact, I will! ..........as soon as I have the time to think up a whole new storyline.

Alink - VCR Man. VCR. · 07-11-2005, 01:55 AM

I just hope you're not making a comic out of spite... Or is it spight? Meh.

OcarinaMan · 07-11-2005, 02:27 AM

Meh. I've seen worse.

1. Don't zoom in that often. It doesn't look good.
2. Keep the scientist accent, IF there's a good reason for it. But seriously, Mr. Nauty is a lame name. Heck, calling him Bob would be funnier.
3. Even if it's just plot, try to throw a small joke in there to keep the interest.
4. The "Chomp Chomp" thing could be a funny running gag, if done right. Otherwise, it could be annoying.
5. Try not to have more characters at once than you can handle. A common mistake is to have more characters than you can handle and some characters just get neglected.
6. Don't make the comics too wide. It stretches the page and gets everybody pissed off.

Glyph Phoenix · 07-11-2005, 11:27 AM

No. Bob is not an awesome name. There have been far too many Bobs in the history of sprite comics. At least with "Mr. Nauty" you know who he's talking about. But if he's a mad scientist shouldn't he be "Dr. Nauty"?

OcarinaMan · 07-11-2005, 11:42 AM

Or Professor Nauty.

Or since he seems to be German, maybe Herr Nauty?

Chunky Kong12345 · 07-11-2005, 11:45 AM

Furher Nauty?

*ducks*

RMC · 07-11-2005, 09:02 PM

Or some thing French like Masuer Nautwa?

06-24-2005, 09:39 PM	#2
Alink - VCR Man. VCR. Member Join Date: Dec 2003 Location: Behind The Wall Of Sleep. Gender: Posts: 768 Thanks: 2 Thanked 1 Time in 1 Post Points: 4,623.99 Bank: 0.00 Total Points: 4,623.99 Donate	NO.

06-24-2005, 07:35 PM	#1
Luigi III Junior Member Join Date: Apr 2005 Location: Who really cares? Gender: Posts: 70 Thanks: 1 Thanked 0 Times in 0 Posts Points: 1,605.23 Bank: 500.00 Total Points: 2,105.23 Donate	All credit to sprites will be given in the final episode. NOTE: KIRBY'S GROUP IS NAMED THE PHANTOM DARKNESS. Episode I: The Phantom Darkness

06-24-2005, 09:51 PM	#3
sladd54 Junior Member Join Date: Jul 2004 Location: my parent\'s basement, right next to the cheers dartboard Posts: 355 Thanks: 0 Thanked 0 Times in 0 Posts Points: 4,023.00 Bank: 500.00 Total Points: 4,523.00 Donate	whatever happened to giving GOOD criticism? at first, it was funny, a few new people eally sucked but now that there's so many, shouldn't we lower our standars a little bit and actually rate the comics without letting our huge gos take over? alright, your comic isn't good, but keep trying don't put the boxes in random places, keep them organized, and make the text a little smaller

06-24-2005, 09:52 PM	#4
Alink - VCR Man. VCR. Member Join Date: Dec 2003 Location: Behind The Wall Of Sleep. Gender: Posts: 768 Thanks: 2 Thanked 1 Time in 1 Post Points: 4,623.99 Bank: 0.00 Total Points: 4,623.99 Donate	It died with this forum's... Goodness. Yes, that will do. And how did it start out funny? Role call. AHHAHA, WHAT A KNEE SLAPPER. It's huge. It stretches the page, thus stretching my face. Or brain. Or mom. OH DISS. It's got a bunch of different characters that look like crap next to eachother. The whole comic's role call and other random crap. And then they leave you in a non-interesting cliff hanger. The stupid Chomp goes Chomp-chomp, and the orange ghost dude goes "He's right". Who's he speaking to? Is the Chomp right? Or is Kirby right that he has a plan? That doesn't make sense. Yes, I'm in a mean mood now. RAWR. [ June 24, 2005, 09:56 PM: Message edited by: ^Alink ]

06-24-2005, 09:57 PM	#5
sladd54 Junior Member Join Date: Jul 2004 Location: my parent\'s basement, right next to the cheers dartboard Posts: 355 Thanks: 0 Thanked 0 Times in 0 Posts Points: 4,023.00 Bank: 500.00 Total Points: 4,523.00 Donate	no, i meant the new people's comics

06-24-2005, 10:07 PM	#6
Glyph Phoenix Member Join Date: Jul 2004 Gender: Posts: 1,774 Thanks: 2 Thanked 1 Time in 1 Post Points: 6,546.00 Bank: 500.00 Total Points: 7,046.00 Donate	There's way too much blank space and you shouldn't resize characters so much. You have too many characters of too many different sizes. On the other hand, Roll Call was a pretty good way to name the characters. Now you just have to look at one panel to connect all the characters with their names and text colors. I'd comment more but I'm still sad from Dylan's comic.

06-25-2005, 08:28 AM	#7
Dylan Banned Mod Join Date: Jul 2001 Location: Teenage Wasteland Gender: Posts: 6,087 Thanks: 849 Thanked 871 Times in 399 Posts Points: 30,186.60 Bank: 0.00 Total Points: 30,186.61 Donate	^ Hush it, you. I'm starting to feel sorry for Kirby. Seems that lately he's been featured in comics with poor reviews. Poor Kirby. ~Dylan

06-25-2005, 10:13 PM	#8
Mr.Hammermap Junior Member Join Date: Nov 2003 Location: POUNDS OF BEER Posts: 479 Thanks: 0 Thanked 0 Times in 0 Posts Points: 5,584.00 Bank: 500.00 Total Points: 6,084.00 Donate	This guy gives Chomps a bad name. And Kirby. And X-Nauts. And Metal Sonic. And Magus. And Luigi's Mansion ghosts. And Doopliss. First off, that is a horrible Kirby edit. "I'M GOING TO MAKE A BAD EYE PATCH ON KIRBY FOR NO REASON!" If you're going to use paint effects, give them purpose instead of randomness, and shade them. Also, those are such original names. Seriously, "Mr. Nauty"? Chomp Chomp? ORANGE GHOST?!? And why does the Chomp say "Chomp Chomp"? If you're not going to let it talk, make it say ARF ARf, as they actually say that. And why did the ghost say anything? It didn't make sense. And whats with the mad scientist voice for the X-Naut? ANd if they're rivaling groups, does it really matter HOW you smite your foes, just as long as you do? Whats the point of Magus, Metal Sonic, and Doopliss if they don't do squat? The panels are awful, and why are they stationed at the hub area of Kirby and the Amazing Mirror? And for the last thing I noticed, why are they in an area that is supposed to be a mountain, but they're on a bunch of clouds? :Spasm: My god I said "And" alot. [ June 25, 2005, 10:17 PM: Message edited by: Chompmaster: Reloaded ]

06-26-2005, 06:47 AM	#9
Glyph Phoenix Member Join Date: Jul 2004 Gender: Posts: 1,774 Thanks: 2 Thanked 1 Time in 1 Post Points: 6,546.00 Bank: 500.00 Total Points: 7,046.00 Donate	You'd have to be pretty crazy to expect good things from this comic--it has a lot of problems--but some of the things you guys are mentioning aren't problems at all. This is the first comic. Some of the characters don't have to do anything just yet. It's pretty obvious that the orange ghost is talking to the Chomp. This is one of those things where the Chomp says stuff that all the characters understand even though all the chomp is actually saying is "Chomp". And who says Chomps don't say "Chomp"? They make chomping noises. They're always chomping. They are called Chomps. The chomping noises could be implemented into a rudimentary form of communication. And you call yourself a chompmaster. And Orange Ghost is an awesome name. A very awesome name. Because if you lined up a bunch of multicolored ghosts some would have crazy awesome names like "Atomic Boo" or such, but then there's the orange ghost called "Orange Ghost". Now that's an awesome name. You can bet that when you look through the comic at all the characters who don't have their original names you'll remember that the orange ghost's name is "Orange Ghost". I bet Green Goblin never had people forget his name. But then again I guess that's part of the superhero business. You name yourself after what you are or maybe after some kind of weapon. If you're a man and you wear a bat costume you can be Batman. If you're like a regular man, except super, you can be Superman. Poor Nightshade. Nobody could get that name right. I never mentioned what a stupid name The Phantom Darkness was. It's not funny like "Orange Ghost". The eye patch isn't funny though. You better have a reason for that one, Luigi III.

07-11-2005, 01:55 AM	#11
Alink - VCR Man. VCR. Member Join Date: Dec 2003 Location: Behind The Wall Of Sleep. Gender: Posts: 768 Thanks: 2 Thanked 1 Time in 1 Post Points: 4,623.99 Bank: 0.00 Total Points: 4,623.99 Donate	I just hope you're not making a comic out of spite... Or is it spight? Meh.

07-11-2005, 02:27 AM	#12
OcarinaMan Member Join Date: Jul 2003 Location: Ikana Castle Posts: 2,482 Thanks: 1 Thanked 5 Times in 3 Posts Points: 7,797.77 Bank: 500.00 Total Points: 8,297.77 Donate	Meh. I've seen worse. 1. Don't zoom in that often. It doesn't look good. 2. Keep the scientist accent, IF there's a good reason for it. But seriously, Mr. Nauty is a lame name. Heck, calling him Bob would be funnier. 3. Even if it's just plot, try to throw a small joke in there to keep the interest. 4. The "Chomp Chomp" thing could be a funny running gag, if done right. Otherwise, it could be annoying. 5. Try not to have more characters at once than you can handle. A common mistake is to have more characters than you can handle and some characters just get neglected. 6. Don't make the comics too wide. It stretches the page and gets everybody pissed off.

07-11-2005, 11:27 AM	#13
Glyph Phoenix Member Join Date: Jul 2004 Gender: Posts: 1,774 Thanks: 2 Thanked 1 Time in 1 Post Points: 6,546.00 Bank: 500.00 Total Points: 7,046.00 Donate	No. Bob is not an awesome name. There have been far too many Bobs in the history of sprite comics. At least with "Mr. Nauty" you know who he's talking about. But if he's a mad scientist shouldn't he be "Dr. Nauty"?

07-11-2005, 11:42 AM	#14
OcarinaMan Member Join Date: Jul 2003 Location: Ikana Castle Posts: 2,482 Thanks: 1 Thanked 5 Times in 3 Posts Points: 7,797.77 Bank: 500.00 Total Points: 8,297.77 Donate	Or Professor Nauty. Or since he seems to be German, maybe Herr Nauty?

07-11-2005, 11:45 AM	#15
Chunky Kong12345 BEEP BEEP I'M A JEEP Join Date: Jan 2001 Location: ogmftwbqq Gender: Posts: 16,412 Thanks: 61 Thanked 209 Times in 152 Posts Points: 2,221.12 Bank: 80,535.77 Total Points: 82,756.89 Donate	Furher Nauty? ducks

07-11-2005, 09:02 PM	#16
RMC Member Join Date: Jul 2004 Location: Phoenix, NY Posts: 1,129 Thanks: 1 Thanked 2 Times in 2 Posts Points: 9,720.05 Bank: 500.00 Total Points: 10,220.05 Donate	Or some thing French like Masuer Nautwa?