The official Stuper Mario Comix - VGF

Irby · 07-19-2006, 06:09 PM

I have just made my first comic to post and its at http://h1.ripway.com/bi55sm55/Stupermario1.GIF
Cut me some slack if its not to your liking its my first comic. Its called Stuper Mario Bros. not super stuper!

hello? Any comments?

Please RATE my comic PLEASE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! !!!!!!!!

I would also like to give credit to No Body(at www.mfgg.com) most of the sprites I used he made.

***Ace Mercury*** · 07-19-2006, 09:53 PM

Perhaps you haven't learned some lessons from this thread: do not double post and do not expect replys within an hour. This board is not as active as the others.

Anyways, I'll give you a short review. Please don't be discouraged; these are all things you can improve upon:

The flow is terrible. Where does Mario go in the third panel? Which order do you read the text? (the first panel all muddles together)
The punchline is lacking. What is it, Luigi wants to buy women's clothes, but then Bowser buys them instead?
There are no backgrounds (although you make a half-hearted attempt with yellow clouds in the first panel). Is that 'the mall' in the fourth panel? Why is there only one block in a sea of blank?
The sprites are cut together poorly. The mushroom platform is inconsistent, the water is missing is places, and you don't even put in a sprite for Kamek. There are sprite artifacts, stray pixels, and GIF dithering.
The font, Arial, screams amateur. There is a grammar mistake in the second panel. Also, there is no need for eighteen exclaimation marks.

As with all things, comicking takes time, effort, and practice. Keep making comics and put an honest effort to improve.

Irby · 07-20-2006, 08:11 AM

At least somebody rated the episode and ya I gonna try to improve but the backgrounds wont always be the greatest why? Because of the stupid white box problem but ive learned to sorda fix that!

***Ace Mercury*** · 07-20-2006, 08:30 AM

I'm of the school that a good artist never blames his/her tools. Learn how to create what you envision, don't make compromises based on lack of knowledge.

Irby · 07-20-2006, 08:53 AM

Riiiiiiiiiiiight....

DR.Death · 07-20-2006, 09:00 AM

well i think its hella tight for a first atempt

Irby · 07-20-2006, 09:30 AM

does that mean good or bad?

Irby · 07-20-2006, 12:16 PM

Hello and episode 2 is in! Im trying to improve on the comic,so rate the comic,leave any comments behind thank you!

Irby · 07-20-2006, 12:18 PM

whoops i forgot to post a link here you go http://h1.ripway.com/bi55sm55/stupermario2.GIF

MC Luigi · 07-20-2006, 12:45 PM

It's okay, but why are they so small and hard to see and read?

Irby · 07-20-2006, 01:43 PM

i dont no i why i find pretty easy to read but ill Try to make them bigger and better!

Irby · 07-20-2006, 04:11 PM

Episode 3 or part 2 of episode 2 is here! I didint work on the humour but I threw in 1 gory part so heres the link!http://h1.ripway.com/bi55sm55/stupermario3.GIF

Irby · 07-20-2006, 05:47 PM

Hello any comments?

Irby · 07-20-2006, 06:32 PM

Hi im gonna take a break from Stuper Mario Bros. to work on my other comics and yes im sorry to Ace Mercury for triple posting(so dont complain).

Irby · 07-20-2006, 07:56 PM

Alright someone make a comment please!!!!!!!!!

***Ace Mercury*** · 07-20-2006, 08:29 PM

-1, Troll

Irby · 07-20-2006, 08:34 PM

Why did you call me a troll?

***Ace Mercury*** · 07-20-2006, 08:42 PM

Okay, on second thought, I'm going to just assume you're not annoying on purpose with incessant posting.

LuWEEGEEman · 07-20-2006, 08:54 PM

Irby · 07-20-2006, 09:04 PM

Um ok then...

07-19-2006, 06:09 PM	#1
Irby Senior Member Join Date: Jul 2006 Location: Canada, Eh. Gender: Posts: 6,448 Thanks: 306 Thanked 93 Times in 78 Posts Blog Entries: 5 Points: 37,691.60 Bank: 13,655.09 Total Points: 51,346.69 Donate	I have just made my first comic to post and its at http://h1.ripway.com/bi55sm55/Stupermario1.GIF Cut me some slack if its not to your liking its my first comic. Its called Stuper Mario Bros. not super stuper! hello? Any comments? Please RATE my comic PLEASE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! !!!!!!!! I would also like to give credit to No Body(at www.mfgg.com) most of the sprites I used he made. Last edited by Super Mario Guy64; 07-22-2006 at 10:38 AM. Reason: Quit triple-posting, you.

07-19-2006, 09:53 PM	#2
*Ace Mercury* Marshmallow Knight ☆ Supermod Join Date: Jun 2000 Location: Southern Ontario Gender: Posts: 18,950 Thanks: 360 Thanked 1,506 Times in 785 Posts Blog Entries: 1 Points: 98,537.30 Bank: 12,446,091.72 Total Points: 12,544,629.02 Donate	Perhaps you haven't learned some lessons from this thread: do not double post and do not expect replys within an hour. This board is not as active as the others. Anyways, I'll give you a short review. Please don't be discouraged; these are all things you can improve upon: The flow is terrible. Where does Mario go in the third panel? Which order do you read the text? (the first panel all muddles together) The punchline is lacking. What is it, Luigi wants to buy women's clothes, but then Bowser buys them instead? There are no backgrounds (although you make a half-hearted attempt with yellow clouds in the first panel). Is that 'the mall' in the fourth panel? Why is there only one block in a sea of blank? The sprites are cut together poorly. The mushroom platform is inconsistent, the water is missing is places, and you don't even put in a sprite for Kamek. There are sprite artifacts, stray pixels, and GIF dithering. The font, Arial, screams amateur. There is a grammar mistake in the second panel. Also, there is no need for eighteen exclaimation marks. As with all things, comicking takes time, effort, and practice. Keep making comics and put an honest effort to improve.

07-20-2006, 12:16 PM	#8
Irby Senior Member Join Date: Jul 2006 Location: Canada, Eh. Gender: Posts: 6,448 Thanks: 306 Thanked 93 Times in 78 Posts Blog Entries: 5 Points: 37,691.60 Bank: 13,655.09 Total Points: 51,346.69 Donate	Episode2 the x-naut menace(or something like that) Hello and episode 2 is in! Im trying to improve on the comic,so rate the comic,leave any comments behind thank you!

07-20-2006, 04:11 PM	#12
Irby Senior Member Join Date: Jul 2006 Location: Canada, Eh. Gender: Posts: 6,448 Thanks: 306 Thanked 93 Times in 78 Posts Blog Entries: 5 Points: 37,691.60 Bank: 13,655.09 Total Points: 51,346.69 Donate	The bros make their escape! Episode 3 or part 2 of episode 2 is here! I didint work on the humour but I threw in 1 gory part so heres the link!http://h1.ripway.com/bi55sm55/stupermario3.GIF

07-20-2006, 06:32 PM	#14
Irby Senior Member Join Date: Jul 2006 Location: Canada, Eh. Gender: Posts: 6,448 Thanks: 306 Thanked 93 Times in 78 Posts Blog Entries: 5 Points: 37,691.60 Bank: 13,655.09 Total Points: 51,346.69 Donate	Game Over or is it... Hi im gonna take a break from Stuper Mario Bros. to work on my other comics and yes im sorry to Ace Mercury for triple posting(so dont complain).

07-20-2006, 08:11 AM	#3
Irby Senior Member Join Date: Jul 2006 Location: Canada, Eh. Gender: Posts: 6,448 Thanks: 306 Thanked 93 Times in 78 Posts Blog Entries: 5 Points: 37,691.60 Bank: 13,655.09 Total Points: 51,346.69 Donate	At least somebody rated the episode and ya I gonna try to improve but the backgrounds wont always be the greatest why? Because of the stupid white box problem but ive learned to sorda fix that!

07-20-2006, 08:30 AM	#4
*Ace Mercury* Marshmallow Knight ☆ Supermod Join Date: Jun 2000 Location: Southern Ontario Gender: Posts: 18,950 Thanks: 360 Thanked 1,506 Times in 785 Posts Blog Entries: 1 Points: 98,537.30 Bank: 12,446,091.72 Total Points: 12,544,629.02 Donate	I'm of the school that a good artist never blames his/her tools. Learn how to create what you envision, don't make compromises based on lack of knowledge.

07-20-2006, 08:53 AM	#5
Irby Senior Member Join Date: Jul 2006 Location: Canada, Eh. Gender: Posts: 6,448 Thanks: 306 Thanked 93 Times in 78 Posts Blog Entries: 5 Points: 37,691.60 Bank: 13,655.09 Total Points: 51,346.69 Donate	Riiiiiiiiiiiight....

07-20-2006, 09:00 AM	#6
DR.Death Junior Member Join Date: Apr 2006 Location: A box in central New York between a cheese factory and a night club Gender: Posts: 246 Thanks: 0 Thanked 4 Times in 2 Posts Points: 2,193.95 Bank: 530.60 Total Points: 2,724.55 Donate	well i think its hella tight for a first atempt

07-20-2006, 09:30 AM	#7
Irby Senior Member Join Date: Jul 2006 Location: Canada, Eh. Gender: Posts: 6,448 Thanks: 306 Thanked 93 Times in 78 Posts Blog Entries: 5 Points: 37,691.60 Bank: 13,655.09 Total Points: 51,346.69 Donate	does that mean good or bad?

07-20-2006, 12:18 PM	#9
Irby Senior Member Join Date: Jul 2006 Location: Canada, Eh. Gender: Posts: 6,448 Thanks: 306 Thanked 93 Times in 78 Posts Blog Entries: 5 Points: 37,691.60 Bank: 13,655.09 Total Points: 51,346.69 Donate	whoops i forgot to post a link here you go http://h1.ripway.com/bi55sm55/stupermario2.GIF

07-20-2006, 12:45 PM	#10
MC Luigi Member Join Date: Apr 2006 Location: In YO FACE Gender: Posts: 1,033 Thanks: 41 Thanked 13 Times in 13 Posts Points: 9,016.64 Bank: 23,165.44 Total Points: 32,182.07 Donate	It's okay, but why are they so small and hard to see and read?

07-20-2006, 01:43 PM	#11
Irby Senior Member Join Date: Jul 2006 Location: Canada, Eh. Gender: Posts: 6,448 Thanks: 306 Thanked 93 Times in 78 Posts Blog Entries: 5 Points: 37,691.60 Bank: 13,655.09 Total Points: 51,346.69 Donate	i dont no i why i find pretty easy to read but ill Try to make them bigger and better!

07-20-2006, 05:47 PM	#13
Irby Senior Member Join Date: Jul 2006 Location: Canada, Eh. Gender: Posts: 6,448 Thanks: 306 Thanked 93 Times in 78 Posts Blog Entries: 5 Points: 37,691.60 Bank: 13,655.09 Total Points: 51,346.69 Donate	Hello any comments?

07-20-2006, 07:56 PM	#15
Irby Senior Member Join Date: Jul 2006 Location: Canada, Eh. Gender: Posts: 6,448 Thanks: 306 Thanked 93 Times in 78 Posts Blog Entries: 5 Points: 37,691.60 Bank: 13,655.09 Total Points: 51,346.69 Donate	Alright someone make a comment please!!!!!!!!!

07-20-2006, 08:29 PM	#16
*Ace Mercury* Marshmallow Knight ☆ Supermod Join Date: Jun 2000 Location: Southern Ontario Gender: Posts: 18,950 Thanks: 360 Thanked 1,506 Times in 785 Posts Blog Entries: 1 Points: 98,537.30 Bank: 12,446,091.72 Total Points: 12,544,629.02 Donate	-1, Troll

07-20-2006, 08:34 PM	#17
Irby Senior Member Join Date: Jul 2006 Location: Canada, Eh. Gender: Posts: 6,448 Thanks: 306 Thanked 93 Times in 78 Posts Blog Entries: 5 Points: 37,691.60 Bank: 13,655.09 Total Points: 51,346.69 Donate	Why did you call me a troll? Last edited by Super Mario Guy64; 07-23-2006 at 08:45 PM.

07-20-2006, 08:42 PM	#18
*Ace Mercury* Marshmallow Knight ☆ Supermod Join Date: Jun 2000 Location: Southern Ontario Gender: Posts: 18,950 Thanks: 360 Thanked 1,506 Times in 785 Posts Blog Entries: 1 Points: 98,537.30 Bank: 12,446,091.72 Total Points: 12,544,629.02 Donate	Okay, on second thought, I'm going to just assume you're not annoying on purpose with incessant posting.

07-20-2006, 08:54 PM	#19
LuWEEGEEman He's coming for you... Join Date: Jul 2006 Location: insert something clever and witty here Gender: Posts: 3,387 Thanks: 56 Thanked 118 Times in 93 Posts Blog Entries: 3 Points: 5,844.62 Bank: 3,674.94 Total Points: 9,519.56 Donate	...

07-20-2006, 09:04 PM	#20
Irby Senior Member Join Date: Jul 2006 Location: Canada, Eh. Gender: Posts: 6,448 Thanks: 306 Thanked 93 Times in 78 Posts Blog Entries: 5 Points: 37,691.60 Bank: 13,655.09 Total Points: 51,346.69 Donate	Um ok then...