One Dark Night

Mush Man · 11-02-2007, 08:18 PM

Enjoy,

All sprites are from ether Spriters Resource or Shyguy Kingdom

Note: The goombas are supposed to be wearing lab coats.

Mush Man · 11-03-2007, 01:10 PM

part #2
now with word bubbles

**Dylan** · 11-03-2007, 11:16 PM

Really bad.

1. That lightning is just awful. So is the hole in the castle. Work on some depth.

2. What's with those awful teeth and eyebrows on "Goomzilla"? This falls in the same line as #1.

3. "Gaint"? A little proper spelling and grammar wouldn't kill you, would it?

4. The last frame of the second comic screams "Look at me! I'm a lazy sack of crap!" If you're going to put that many panels into your comic, you should at least be able to fill all of them.

5. The intro to the comic (You, I presume, walking in stating you need a plot.) is just awkward and unnecessary overall. Why bother with it?

This comic needs work. Get crackin'.

-Dylan

Mush Man · 11-06-2007, 07:14 PM

Part 3

the story is going to get better

BLUEShyGuy · 11-06-2007, 09:46 PM

i think its awesome!! +1 for u woot!!

**Dylan** · 11-06-2007, 10:13 PM

^ I think you're wrong. Very wrong. Why are you so wrong?

Do you really need to label "What Luigi sees" and "dust clouds"? For that matter, don't use the spray tool for dust, blood, fire, etc. There are plenty of ways to manipulate sprites to create clouds of dust; quit being so goddamn lazy.

-Dylan

BLUEShyGuy · 11-07-2007, 02:18 PM

dont listen to him its awesome!!

Mush Man · 11-07-2007, 04:29 PM

^^I've made better dust clouds, but the new picture wont load properly
And no the "What Luigi Sees" isn't really necessary, but why not?

-MusnMan

**Dylan** · 11-07-2007, 08:30 PM

^^ Yeah, you're completely right; don't listen to the mod of this forum. That's a great idea.

^ Why not? Because you just said it yourself; it's unnecessary. Why is there reason to have it? Just don't do it anymore.

-Dylan

Mush Man · 11-07-2007, 09:21 PM

^Fine I wasn't planning on using binoculars again anyway

-MusnMan

**L007 is Undecided** · 11-07-2007, 10:51 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by BLUEShyGuy

dont listen to me i have adhd!!!

Mush Man · 11-09-2007, 04:07 PM

in case your wondering the background is lighter because it's day time now

BLUEShyGuy · 11-09-2007, 04:11 PM

wtf

what did i do?!!!

Mush Man · 11-09-2007, 04:18 PM

^ no idea
-MusnMan

LuWEEGEEman · 11-09-2007, 05:07 PM

Its not so bad.

Mush Man · 11-09-2007, 05:16 PM

In the next comic I will get back to Mario and Luigi

SephirothKirby · 11-09-2007, 05:21 PM

How sly, indicating the readers that it's a bush by having Toadsworth say it instead of labeling it "Bush"

Oh wait, that's not sly.

Seriously, if you feel you need to label it in ANY sense, it is NOT a good Bush. Plus, that's on even a sprite, it's just an MS Paint scribble. You've been told this. You have good potential if you use it.

Mush Man · 11-09-2007, 05:27 PM

The bush isn't suposed to look realistic you'll understand why in a later comic

-MusnMan

BLUEShyGuy · 11-09-2007, 05:33 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by SephirothKirby

Plus, that's on even a sprite, it's just an MS Paint scribble. You've been told this. You have good potential if you use it.

i know its not a sprite its a drawing in ms paint

SephirothKirby · 11-09-2007, 05:44 PM

^^ Does that have anything to do with what I just said?

I mean I suppose it does, but I wasn't speaking to you, so it doesn't.

EDIT: Oh, thanks Dylan, you told him before I could.

11-03-2007, 11:16 PM	#3
Dylan Banned Mod Join Date: Jul 2001 Location: Teenage Wasteland Gender: Posts: 6,280 Thanks: 951 Thanked 944 Times in 435 Posts Points: 32,800.76 Bank: 0.00 Total Points: 32,800.77 Donate	Bad. Really bad. 1. That lightning is just awful. So is the hole in the castle. Work on some depth. 2. What's with those awful teeth and eyebrows on "Goomzilla"? This falls in the same line as #1. 3. "Gaint"? A little proper spelling and grammar wouldn't kill you, would it? 4. The last frame of the second comic screams "Look at me! I'm a lazy sack of crap!" If you're going to put that many panels into your comic, you should at least be able to fill all of them. 5. The intro to the comic (You, I presume, walking in stating you need a plot.) is just awkward and unnecessary overall. Why bother with it? This comic needs work. Get crackin'. -Dylan

11-06-2007, 07:14 PM	#4
Mush Man Senior Member Join Date: Oct 2007 Location: Trekkin' Gender: Posts: 3,919 Thanks: 163 Thanked 178 Times in 139 Posts Points: 2,047.16 Bank: 8,167.50 Total Points: 10,214.66 Donate	Part 3 the story is going to get better Last edited by MUSHMAN; 11-07-2007 at 04:33 PM.

11-07-2007, 04:29 PM	#8
Mush Man Senior Member Join Date: Oct 2007 Location: Trekkin' Gender: Posts: 3,919 Thanks: 163 Thanked 178 Times in 139 Posts Points: 2,047.16 Bank: 8,167.50 Total Points: 10,214.66 Donate	^^I've made better dust clouds, but the new picture wont load properly And no the "What Luigi Sees" isn't really necessary, but why not? -MusnMan Last edited by MUSHMAN; 11-08-2007 at 03:17 PM. Reason: It is possible

11-09-2007, 05:21 PM	#17
SephirothKirby Senior Member Join Date: Sep 2006 Location: **** YEAH SEAKING! Gender: Posts: 4,120 Thanks: 215 Thanked 310 Times in 182 Posts Points: 956.40 Bank: 119,758.71 Total Points: 120,715.11 Donate	How sly, indicating the readers that it's a bush by having Toadsworth say it instead of labeling it "Bush" Oh wait, that's not sly. Seriously, if you feel you need to label it in ANY sense, it is NOT a good Bush. Plus, that's on even a sprite, it's just an MS Paint scribble. You've been told this. You have good potential if you use it. Last edited by SephirothKirby; 11-09-2007 at 05:43 PM. Reason: Typo.

11-02-2007, 08:18 PM	#1
Mush Man Senior Member Join Date: Oct 2007 Location: Trekkin' Gender: Posts: 3,919 Thanks: 163 Thanked 178 Times in 139 Posts Points: 2,047.16 Bank: 8,167.50 Total Points: 10,214.66 Donate	One Dark Night Enjoy, All sprites are from ether Spriters Resource or Shyguy Kingdom Note: The goombas are supposed to be wearing lab coats. Last edited by MUSHMAN; 11-03-2007 at 12:37 PM. Reason: I can

11-03-2007, 01:10 PM	#2
Mush Man Senior Member Join Date: Oct 2007 Location: Trekkin' Gender: Posts: 3,919 Thanks: 163 Thanked 178 Times in 139 Posts Points: 2,047.16 Bank: 8,167.50 Total Points: 10,214.66 Donate	part #2 now with word bubbles Last edited by MUSHMAN; 11-04-2007 at 12:06 PM.

11-06-2007, 09:46 PM	#5
BLUEShyGuy Junior Member Join Date: Nov 2007 Location: at my house Gender: Posts: 82 Thanks: 8 Thanked 9 Times in 2 Posts Points: 1,124.13 Bank: 0.00 Total Points: 1,124.13 Donate	i think its awesome!! +1 for u woot!!

11-06-2007, 10:13 PM	#6
Dylan Banned Mod Join Date: Jul 2001 Location: Teenage Wasteland Gender: Posts: 6,280 Thanks: 951 Thanked 944 Times in 435 Posts Points: 32,800.76 Bank: 0.00 Total Points: 32,800.77 Donate	^ I think you're wrong. Very wrong. Why are you so wrong? Do you really need to label "What Luigi sees" and "dust clouds"? For that matter, don't use the spray tool for dust, blood, fire, etc. There are plenty of ways to manipulate sprites to create clouds of dust; quit being so goddamn lazy. -Dylan

11-07-2007, 02:18 PM	#7
BLUEShyGuy Junior Member Join Date: Nov 2007 Location: at my house Gender: Posts: 82 Thanks: 8 Thanked 9 Times in 2 Posts Points: 1,124.13 Bank: 0.00 Total Points: 1,124.13 Donate	dont listen to him its awesome!!

11-07-2007, 08:30 PM	#9
Dylan Banned Mod Join Date: Jul 2001 Location: Teenage Wasteland Gender: Posts: 6,280 Thanks: 951 Thanked 944 Times in 435 Posts Points: 32,800.76 Bank: 0.00 Total Points: 32,800.77 Donate	^^ Yeah, you're completely right; don't listen to the mod of this forum. That's a great idea. ^ Why not? Because you just said it yourself; it's unnecessary. Why is there reason to have it? Just don't do it anymore. -Dylan

11-07-2007, 09:21 PM	#10
Mush Man Senior Member Join Date: Oct 2007 Location: Trekkin' Gender: Posts: 3,919 Thanks: 163 Thanked 178 Times in 139 Posts Points: 2,047.16 Bank: 8,167.50 Total Points: 10,214.66 Donate	^Fine I wasn't planning on using binoculars again anyway -MusnMan

11-09-2007, 04:07 PM	#12
Mush Man Senior Member Join Date: Oct 2007 Location: Trekkin' Gender: Posts: 3,919 Thanks: 163 Thanked 178 Times in 139 Posts Points: 2,047.16 Bank: 8,167.50 Total Points: 10,214.66 Donate	in case your wondering the background is lighter because it's day time now

11-09-2007, 04:11 PM	#13
BLUEShyGuy Junior Member Join Date: Nov 2007 Location: at my house Gender: Posts: 82 Thanks: 8 Thanked 9 Times in 2 Posts Points: 1,124.13 Bank: 0.00 Total Points: 1,124.13 Donate	wtf what did i do?!!!

11-09-2007, 04:18 PM	#14
Mush Man Senior Member Join Date: Oct 2007 Location: Trekkin' Gender: Posts: 3,919 Thanks: 163 Thanked 178 Times in 139 Posts Points: 2,047.16 Bank: 8,167.50 Total Points: 10,214.66 Donate	^ no idea -MusnMan

11-09-2007, 05:07 PM	#15
LuWEEGEEman THE EYES Join Date: Jul 2006 Location: go die in a fire Gender: Posts: 4,238 Thanks: 112 Thanked 189 Times in 154 Posts Blog Entries: 3 Points: 14,730.37 Bank: 4,479.73 Total Points: 19,210.10 Donate	Its not so bad.

11-09-2007, 05:16 PM	#16
Mush Man Senior Member Join Date: Oct 2007 Location: Trekkin' Gender: Posts: 3,919 Thanks: 163 Thanked 178 Times in 139 Posts Points: 2,047.16 Bank: 8,167.50 Total Points: 10,214.66 Donate	In the next comic I will get back to Mario and Luigi

11-09-2007, 05:27 PM	#18
Mush Man Senior Member Join Date: Oct 2007 Location: Trekkin' Gender: Posts: 3,919 Thanks: 163 Thanked 178 Times in 139 Posts Points: 2,047.16 Bank: 8,167.50 Total Points: 10,214.66 Donate	The bush isn't suposed to look realistic you'll understand why in a later comic -MusnMan

11-09-2007, 05:44 PM	#20
SephirothKirby Senior Member Join Date: Sep 2006 Location: **** YEAH SEAKING! Gender: Posts: 4,120 Thanks: 215 Thanked 310 Times in 182 Posts Points: 956.40 Bank: 119,758.71 Total Points: 120,715.11 Donate	^^ Does that have anything to do with what I just said? I mean I suppose it does, but I wasn't speaking to you, so it doesn't. EDIT: Oh, thanks Dylan, you told him before I could.