Hello everyone, post a joke, it's back!!! - VGF

**Platinum** · 11-23-2007, 08:01 PM

post your favorite joke... mine will come later, i am in a toss up...

keep it clean please

Mikhail Gorbachev · 11-23-2007, 08:09 PM

A penguin and a polar bear are sitting in a bathtub. The polar bear says, "Pass the soap." And the penguin says, "No soap, radio!"

Smarmy Vent · 11-23-2007, 08:13 PM

A little blind girl goes up to her mum and says, "Mummy, mummy, when will I be able to see?"

Her mum replies "I'll tell you what, I'll take you to the chemist and get you some special cream for your eyes and you will be able to see in the morning."

So off they went to the chemist, got the cream, and went home, all the while the little girl was getting more and more excited at the prospect of being able to see again. Once they got home, the mother put the cream on the little girls eyes, wrapped a bandage around her head, and took her to bed.

The following morning the little girl stumbled into her mums bedroom and excitedly shouted "Quick mummy, take off the bandage so that i will be able to see again."

So the mother slowly took of all the bandages, taking her time, and all the while the little girl was getting more and more excited. Once they were off the little girl said "But mummy, I still can't see."

To which the mother replied, "April fool!"

YOU ARE MY FRIENDS · 11-23-2007, 08:20 PM

^^

A fish walks into a bar. The bartender asks, "What do you want?" And the fish says...

Wait for it...

"WATER!"

**Platinum** · 11-23-2007, 08:29 PM

not the funniest but good...

Three women are about to be executed for crimes they committed. One’s a brunette, one’s a redhead, and one’s a blonde.

Two guards brings the brunette forward, and the executioner asks if she has any last requests. She says no, and the executioner shouts, “Ready… Aim…” Suddenly the brunette yells, “Earthquake!” Everyone is startled and looks around. She manages to escape.

The angry guards then bring the redhead forward, and the executioner asks if she has any last requests. She says no, and the executioner shouts, “Ready… Aim…” The redhead then screams, “Tornado!” Yet again, everyone is startled and looks around. She too escapes execution.

By this point, the blonde had figured out what the others did and knew exactly what she needed to do. The guards bring her forward, and the executioner asks if she has any last requests. She also says no, and the executioner shouts, “Ready… Aim…”

The blonde shouts, “Fire!”

Smarmy Vent · 11-23-2007, 10:38 PM

^ Apparently the executioners were all blonde, too.

**Platinum** · 11-23-2007, 10:58 PM

not as blonde as this guy

A blond guy and a brunette girl were happily married and about to have a baby. One day, the wife started having contractions, so the husband rushed her to the hospital. He held her hand as she went through a trying birth. In the end, there were two little baby boys.
The blond guy turned to his wife and angrily said, "All right, who's the other father!?!"

11-23-2007, 08:01 PM	#1
Platinum Arcade Mod Join Date: Apr 2005 Location: Wv Gender: Posts: 1,369 Thanks: 48 Thanked 21 Times in 21 Posts Points: 1,383.24 Bank: 23,885.95 Total Points: 25,269.19 Donate	Hello everyone, post a joke, it's back!!! post your favorite joke... mine will come later, i am in a toss up... keep it clean please

11-23-2007, 08:20 PM	#4
YOU ARE MY FRIENDS JESUS SAID Join Date: Jun 2005 Location: ON A FRIENDSHIP TREK (Panfan) Gender: Posts: 11,102 Thanks: 474 Thanked 833 Times in 596 Posts Blog Entries: 12 Points: 1,740.44 Bank: 21,468.11 Total Points: 23,208.55 Donate	^^ A fish walks into a bar. The bartender asks, "What do you want?" And the fish says... Wait for it... "WATER!" __________________ Last edited by Panfan; 11-23-2007 at 09:27 PM.

11-23-2007, 08:09 PM	#2
Mikhail Gorbachev Senior Member Join Date: Nov 2004 Gender: Posts: 9,481 Thanks: 25 Thanked 60 Times in 45 Posts Points: 13.00 Bank: 23,461.58 Total Points: 23,474.58 Donate	A penguin and a polar bear are sitting in a bathtub. The polar bear says, "Pass the soap." And the penguin says, "No soap, radio!"

11-23-2007, 08:13 PM	#3
Smarmy Vent The night is darkest just before the dawn. Join Date: Jun 2006 Location: Gotham Gender: Posts: 12,618 Thanks: 722 Thanked 1,134 Times in 598 Posts Points: 49.44 Bank: 115,472.15 Total Points: 115,521.59 Donate	A little blind girl goes up to her mum and says, "Mummy, mummy, when will I be able to see?" Her mum replies "I'll tell you what, I'll take you to the chemist and get you some special cream for your eyes and you will be able to see in the morning." So off they went to the chemist, got the cream, and went home, all the while the little girl was getting more and more excited at the prospect of being able to see again. Once they got home, the mother put the cream on the little girls eyes, wrapped a bandage around her head, and took her to bed. The following morning the little girl stumbled into her mums bedroom and excitedly shouted "Quick mummy, take off the bandage so that i will be able to see again." So the mother slowly took of all the bandages, taking her time, and all the while the little girl was getting more and more excited. Once they were off the little girl said "But mummy, I still can't see." To which the mother replied, "April fool!"

11-23-2007, 08:29 PM	#5
Platinum Arcade Mod Join Date: Apr 2005 Location: Wv Gender: Posts: 1,369 Thanks: 48 Thanked 21 Times in 21 Posts Points: 1,383.24 Bank: 23,885.95 Total Points: 25,269.19 Donate	not the funniest but good... Three women are about to be executed for crimes they committed. One’s a brunette, one’s a redhead, and one’s a blonde. Two guards brings the brunette forward, and the executioner asks if she has any last requests. She says no, and the executioner shouts, “Ready… Aim…” Suddenly the brunette yells, “Earthquake!” Everyone is startled and looks around. She manages to escape. The angry guards then bring the redhead forward, and the executioner asks if she has any last requests. She says no, and the executioner shouts, “Ready… Aim…” The redhead then screams, “Tornado!” Yet again, everyone is startled and looks around. She too escapes execution. By this point, the blonde had figured out what the others did and knew exactly what she needed to do. The guards bring her forward, and the executioner asks if she has any last requests. She also says no, and the executioner shouts, “Ready… Aim…” The blonde shouts, “Fire!”

11-23-2007, 10:38 PM	#6
Smarmy Vent The night is darkest just before the dawn. Join Date: Jun 2006 Location: Gotham Gender: Posts: 12,618 Thanks: 722 Thanked 1,134 Times in 598 Posts Points: 49.44 Bank: 115,472.15 Total Points: 115,521.59 Donate	^ Apparently the executioners were all blonde, too.

11-23-2007, 10:58 PM	#7
Platinum Arcade Mod Join Date: Apr 2005 Location: Wv Gender: Posts: 1,369 Thanks: 48 Thanked 21 Times in 21 Posts Points: 1,383.24 Bank: 23,885.95 Total Points: 25,269.19 Donate	not as blonde as this guy A blond guy and a brunette girl were happily married and about to have a baby. One day, the wife started having contractions, so the husband rushed her to the hospital. He held her hand as she went through a trying birth. In the end, there were two little baby boys. The blond guy turned to his wife and angrily said, "All right, who's the other father!?!"