MK's Reviews: Bebe's Kids

01-17-2004, 03:29 AM

After all of that Sonic experience. I decided to play a crappy game.. a VERY crappy game called Bebe's Kids. (Listed #1 as Nintendo Power's "worst" games)

Graphics: Holy crap, its Super Fat Albert Children Edition! Wait. Its just meddling kids kicking some mascot ass in the first stage.. Sorry to say, but these graphics literally SUCK. God. I can't believe my eyes were able to see them.
0/10

Sound: Wow. This is even worse than Clu Clu Land's 4 minute long 5 second loop song. Just add crappy rap sounds for 3 seconds and you got the Stage 1 theme. And yes, I had to play THIS while listening to THIS. It was pure torture. My ears BLEEDED by the badly-done rap "music".
0/10

Gameplay: Wow. Kick/Punch a guy in the knee/crotch a few times kills them. Now this must be where GTA came from.. (just kidding) The choppy animation makes some crappy movement that looks like psychedelic slow motion. For example..
kid: YO DOOD. I CAN DO TIS!1111
*kid does some weirdass motion walking forward*
Yep, skiddy animation. Even a person with Flash can do better than this.
0/10

The Players: You play as 2 trouble-making kids called "LaShawn" (Who is a girl who has a bubble that never pops, which is simply ironic) and "KahLil" (Who is a midget who raps like a "dawggy dawg" as he calls himself, pretty sad that he punches/kicks guys in the private area..) What a "intruging" bunch of characters.
0/10

The Enemies: Wow. This must be a racial game or something. The main characters are black and most of the enemies are white. This is just plain ironic. "Paramount Pictures" (the most sad company who made this game) must live in a ghetto or something. Whoever thought the FBI wander into a bar and try to catch ONE kid and avoid everyone who is illegally doing stuff? Paramount Pictures knows! They created this awful game!
0/10

Pros:
Nothing.

Cons:
Basically everything in this game.

Overall: Man. I had a lot of fun reviewing this. Because a horrible game must get a horrible review. I might do another horrible game next time. But AVOID THIS AT ALL COSTS!
0/10

01-17-2004, 04:04 AM

lol, I've never even heard of this game.

01-17-2004, 10:37 AM

Here's a link of a review of that game, including screenshots, if you're brave enough to click it.

Godot · 01-17-2004, 07:34 PM

^
OH MY GOD! MY EYES! THEY BURN! AHHHHHHHHHH!

A Genius · 01-17-2004, 09:28 PM

I watched the movie this game was evidentally based on a while ago. I mean, years ago. Can't say much on the game but giving a movie summary (as far as I can remember) is a little more than I can resist. So...

The movie starts out, as I recall, with some live action random black guy on TV. He says something or other, and then we see an animated version of the black guy stumbling towards a bar. He then begins talking about why he so drunk.

See, it all started out with him meeting some woman. He coughs up some pieces of beetle, for some reason that escapes me (and, even stranger, I was about to write that he coughed up beetle semen). They go off on a date to an amusement park (or something), and she says she has to take her son. It turns out, she has to take her son, and 3 other kids which are Bebe's Kids.

Bebe's kids are brats. In the intro, it showed the baby (sort of a ghetto Stewie), driving his tricycle over some people and into a grocry store, and picking up some bottled milk. They speak da ghetto talk a lot, and they imply that the girl has a thing for the other son (the one that isn't one of Bebe's Kids). I seem to remember that the other kid gives someone a wedgie, and all the 2-year-olds watching burst into laughter. Those are Bebe's kids.

We never meet Bebe, but we learn through the conversations of blackparents that Bebe is a prostitute, and a pretty pathetic one to boot. She doesn't have any food in her refrigerator, and the kids are all starving. See, they may be ghetto follow-ups to Stewie from Family Guy, but they're deprived ghetto follow-ups to Stewie from Family Guy.

More shenanigans happen, and a robot Abraham Lincoln tries to defend one of Bebe's kids in robot court. He doesn't seem to be winning, but wait! The other kid that isn't Bebe's kid bursts into a rap song! The robots simply gain newfound heart in the face of a little kid shouting softly while light beats play behind him! The day is saved!

Blackparents take all four kids home, but blackguy is ashamed of leaving them in a house with no food. The falshback ends with him at a bar, and an old white guy (the point being, that white guys SUCK) says he did the right thing, and falls off his chair singing, cause he's drunk.

So, blackparents pick up Bebe's kids and go to Las Vegas, whereupon balckbaby pulls the plug out of the main power station, sending a city blackout. The End.

-A Genius (Oh, and the game probably sucks as well.)

[ January 17, 2004, 09:29 PM: Message edited by: A Genius is stoopit ]

01-18-2004, 02:47 PM

O.O

01-18-2004, 07:56 PM

^^I don't get it. Why would something that stupid be a movie?

01-19-2004, 11:07 AM

^ $$$

I mean, they make movies about everything.

Where are these lemmings going? The Super Nintendo Super Shire! Hop in line and follow them there!

01-17-2004, 03:29 AM	#1
abc Guest Posts: n/a	After all of that Sonic experience. I decided to play a crappy game.. a VERY crappy game called Bebe's Kids. (Listed #1 as Nintendo Power's "worst" games) Graphics: Holy crap, its Super Fat Albert Children Edition! Wait. Its just meddling kids kicking some mascot ass in the first stage.. Sorry to say, but these graphics literally SUCK. God. I can't believe my eyes were able to see them. 0/10 Sound: Wow. This is even worse than Clu Clu Land's 4 minute long 5 second loop song. Just add crappy rap sounds for 3 seconds and you got the Stage 1 theme. And yes, I had to play THIS while listening to THIS. It was pure torture. My ears BLEEDED by the badly-done rap "music". 0/10 Gameplay: Wow. Kick/Punch a guy in the knee/crotch a few times kills them. Now this must be where GTA came from.. (just kidding) The choppy animation makes some crappy movement that looks like psychedelic slow motion. For example.. kid: YO DOOD. I CAN DO TIS!1111 kid does some weirdass motion walking forward Yep, skiddy animation. Even a person with Flash can do better than this. 0/10 The Players: You play as 2 trouble-making kids called "LaShawn" (Who is a girl who has a bubble that never pops, which is simply ironic) and "KahLil" (Who is a midget who raps like a "dawggy dawg" as he calls himself, pretty sad that he punches/kicks guys in the private area..) What a "intruging" bunch of characters. 0/10 The Enemies: Wow. This must be a racial game or something. The main characters are black and most of the enemies are white. This is just plain ironic. "Paramount Pictures" (the most sad company who made this game) must live in a ghetto or something. Whoever thought the FBI wander into a bar and try to catch ONE kid and avoid everyone who is illegally doing stuff? Paramount Pictures knows! They created this awful game! 0/10 Pros: Nothing. Cons: Basically everything in this game. Overall: Man. I had a lot of fun reviewing this. Because a horrible game must get a horrible review. I might do another horrible game next time. But AVOID THIS AT ALL COSTS! 0/10

01-17-2004, 04:04 AM	#2
Sim Kid Guest Posts: n/a	lol, I've never even heard of this game.

01-17-2004, 10:37 AM	#3
Virtual Cat Guest Posts: n/a	Here's a link of a review of that game, including screenshots, if you're brave enough to click it.

01-17-2004, 07:34 PM	#4
Godot Senior Member Join Date: Oct 2003 Location: Coffee. Gender: Posts: 6,054 Thanks: 169 Thanked 161 Times in 102 Posts	^ OH MY GOD! MY EYES! THEY BURN! AHHHHHHHHHH!

01-17-2004, 09:28 PM	#5
A Genius Senior Member Join Date: May 2001 Location: Place Posts: 2,657 Thanks: 0 Thanked 0 Times in 0 Posts	I watched the movie this game was evidentally based on a while ago. I mean, years ago. Can't say much on the game but giving a movie summary (as far as I can remember) is a little more than I can resist. So... The movie starts out, as I recall, with some live action random black guy on TV. He says something or other, and then we see an animated version of the black guy stumbling towards a bar. He then begins talking about why he so drunk. See, it all started out with him meeting some woman. He coughs up some pieces of beetle, for some reason that escapes me (and, even stranger, I was about to write that he coughed up beetle semen). They go off on a date to an amusement park (or something), and she says she has to take her son. It turns out, she has to take her son, and 3 other kids which are Bebe's Kids. Bebe's kids are brats. In the intro, it showed the baby (sort of a ghetto Stewie), driving his tricycle over some people and into a grocry store, and picking up some bottled milk. They speak da ghetto talk a lot, and they imply that the girl has a thing for the other son (the one that isn't one of Bebe's Kids). I seem to remember that the other kid gives someone a wedgie, and all the 2-year-olds watching burst into laughter. Those are Bebe's kids. We never meet Bebe, but we learn through the conversations of blackparents that Bebe is a prostitute, and a pretty pathetic one to boot. She doesn't have any food in her refrigerator, and the kids are all starving. See, they may be ghetto follow-ups to Stewie from Family Guy, but they're deprived ghetto follow-ups to Stewie from Family Guy. More shenanigans happen, and a robot Abraham Lincoln tries to defend one of Bebe's kids in robot court. He doesn't seem to be winning, but wait! The other kid that isn't Bebe's kid bursts into a rap song! The robots simply gain newfound heart in the face of a little kid shouting softly while light beats play behind him! The day is saved! Blackparents take all four kids home, but blackguy is ashamed of leaving them in a house with no food. The falshback ends with him at a bar, and an old white guy (the point being, that white guys SUCK) says he did the right thing, and falls off his chair singing, cause he's drunk. So, blackparents pick up Bebe's kids and go to Las Vegas, whereupon balckbaby pulls the plug out of the main power station, sending a city blackout. The End. -A Genius (Oh, and the game probably sucks as well.) [ January 17, 2004, 09:29 PM: Message edited by: A Genius is stoopit ]

01-18-2004, 07:56 PM	#7
Virtual Cat Guest Posts: n/a	^^I don't get it. Why would something that stupid be a movie?

01-19-2004, 11:07 AM	#8
CodieKitty Guest Posts: n/a	^ $$$ I mean, they make movies about everything. Where are these lemmings going? The Super Nintendo Super Shire! Hop in line and follow them there!