I'm in my twenties, and I don't know how a telephone works

Metal Mario · 03-10-2010, 11:19 AM

Here's a TV commercial for Sprint's "Now Network":

At 0:01 - Okay, first of all, I don't even know what a "network" is. Does it represent the number of people who subscribe to a particular service? The ad hasn't even taken off, and I'm already on shaky ground.

At 0:09 - All right, I know that some people in the world (not me, obviously) use their mobile phones to send and receive email. I don't have any idea how this works, however. How does your phone get the Internet? Do you need an iPhone? What is an iPhone?

At 0:23 - More Internet antics. A video is being uploaded? I don't even know how to upload a video on a computer, let alone a phone. I do have a vague idea of what it means to "upload" and "download" something, but...well, for me, uploading and downloading is like sex; it's something that everybody in the world besides me is doing.

At 0:28 - I guess I know what text messaging is, but I don't know how you do it. Do you need a special kind of phone? Do you need an iPhone? What is an iPhone? And what's the point of using text messaging, anyway? I mean, you've got the phone right there in your hands. Wouldn't it be simpler and more to the point to just talk?

At 0:35 - As ever, I have no idea what Twitter is, or how you do it.

At 0:52 - America's most dependable 3G network? Well, there's only three problems with that.

1. I don't know what a "G" is. (I think drug dealers use it as slang for $1000, but that's all I can come up with.)

2. I don't know what a "3G" is.

3. I don't know what a network is.

At 0:54 - Okay, wait a minute, now they're talking about a 4G network! Does that replace the 3G network? Or is it a natural and inevitable evolution? What's the difference between 3G and 4G? What can the 4G do that the 3G can't? Does it just advance even further from here? Are we going to have 5G in a few months' time? And if you've already got the 4G network up and running, why are you even bothering to advertise the 3G network?!

The sad thing is that I'm only 26. By the time I'm 30, I won't even be able to function as a member of society.

**Deku Trii** · 03-10-2010, 12:27 PM

I could explain most of that, but it would take a while to type up since I'm posting from my phone.

Glux · 03-10-2010, 01:38 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Metal Mario

At 0:01 - Okay, first of all, I don't even know what a "network" is. Does it represent the number of people who subscribe to a particular service?

A "network" is a large number of people connected by something. Like Facebook, MySpace, and numerous Forums are examples of social "network" websites. So you're very close.

Quote:

At 0:09 - All right, I know that some people in the world (not me, obviously) use their mobile phones to send and receive email. I don't have any idea how this works, however. How does your phone get the Internet?

The same way your phone is able to call other phones.

Quote:

Do you need an iPhone? What is an iPhone?

Hell naw. An iPhone is just a touch-screen phone. Nothing special.

Quote:

At 0:23 - More Internet antics. A video is being uploaded? I don't even know how to upload a video on a computer, let alone a phone. I do have a vague idea of what it means to "upload" and "download" something, but...well, for me, uploading and downloading is like sex; it's something that everybody in the world besides me is doing.

You can only upload videos in places that allow it. Usually has a button to click that says "Upload" or "Upload Video". YouTube has an upload button in it's top-right corner.

Quote:

At 0:28 - I guess I know what text messaging is, but I don't know how you do it. Do you need a special kind of phone?

No, but your phone contract must allow it.

Quote:

Do you need an iPhone? What is an iPhone?

Hell naw. An iPhone is just a touch-screen phone. Nothing special.

Quote:

And what's the point of using text messaging, anyway? I mean, you've got the phone right there in your hands. Wouldn't it be simpler and more to the point to just talk?

Well, isn't that the $1,000,000 question?

Quote:

At 0:35 - As ever, I have no idea what Twitter is, or how you do it.

Go to Twitter make an account, and type.

Quote:

At 0:52 - America's most dependable 3G network? Well, there's only three problems with that.

1. I don't know what a "G" is. (I think drug dealers use it as slang for $1000, but that's all I can come up with.)

2. I don't know what a "3G" is.

3. I don't know what a network is.

1. Does anyone?

2. Does anyone?

3. I already told you.

Quote:

At 0:54 - Okay, wait a minute, now they're talking about a 4G network! Does that replace the 3G network? Or is it a natural and inevitable evolution? What's the difference between 3G and 4G? What can the 4G do that the 3G can't? Does it just advance even further from here? Are we going to have 5G in a few months' time? And if you've already got the 4G network up and running, why are you even bothering to advertise the 3G network?!

No normal people know what the **** 3G or 4G even mean. It's probably just to make them sound appealing.

Quote:

The sad thing is that I'm only 26. By the time I'm 30, I won't even be able to function as a member of society.

Silly people who haven't grown up with this stuff.

I don't care if this is a joke or not. I was bored and needed something to do.

Metal Mario · 03-10-2010, 02:21 PM

^Not a joke. And I thank you for your explanations, as they have served to clarify at least some things. (I'd still like to know what a "G" is, though.)

Glux · 03-10-2010, 02:28 PM

[quote=Metal Mario;1194857]^Not a joke. And I thank you for your explanations, as they have served to clarify at least some things.[quote]
You're welcome.

Quote:

(I'd still like to know what a "G" is, though.)

Wouldn't we all?

Metal Man · 03-10-2010, 02:45 PM

G = Generation.

But it's not very important anyway. Despite my techno-literacy, phones are literally the least important devices to me.

I don't want some high-powered wallet destroyer when I can do more with a computer for less money.

Glux · 03-10-2010, 02:52 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Metal Man

G = Generation.

Oh, so it's like Pokémon? 1st Gen, 2nd Gen, 3rd Gen, 4th Gen, etc.

Quote:

But it's not very important anyway. Despite my techno-literacy, phones are literally the least important devices to me.

Agreed.

Luigiman7 · 03-10-2010, 04:02 PM

GIGABYTE

PONIES · 03-10-2010, 04:52 PM

I'm pretty sure "G" refers to Generation... I remember hearing it called Generation somewhere...

MeowMan · 03-10-2010, 05:03 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Deku Trii

I could explain most of that, but it would take a while to type up since I'm posting from my phone.

I almost ran out of breath laughing at this post.

And thats not good, because I have asthma..

Vapor · 03-10-2010, 08:24 PM

this is adorable

"G" means " 1 gram"

Rainbow Dash · 03-10-2010, 10:35 PM

G actually is the universal gravitational constant

g is 1 gram

Robotazy · 03-10-2010, 10:45 PM

dude that ad is a year old.

we're totally taking pictures, playing video games, and going on the internet with our phones

Also, G's

**Deku Trii** · 03-10-2010, 10:54 PM

Weird how that link doesn't talk about what came before 2G: the original generation, which was developed in Compton,CA and was known as OG.

Lurch1982 · 03-11-2010, 01:30 AM

3G = 3rd Generation. Its a wireless standard, basically saying the device has to be able to do certain things at certain speeds. Mainly indicates the higher download/upload speeds and the ability to do data/voice simultaneously. A similar but not quite the same example is a/b/g/n WiFi designations.

Really though, 3G/4G is mostly marketing speak in the commercials.

***Cosmonautical*** · 03-11-2010, 08:41 AM

4G: Sound it out. Obviously, it's an orgy between 4 persons. Also, the G is for Gay. It's a 4-person gay orgy.

Metal Mario · 03-11-2010, 09:24 AM

If the four gay persons were gay women, and hot, then that would be enough to convince me to get the 4G network.

**X-3** · 03-11-2010, 11:13 AM

Nope. You get Lemonparty+.

**LASER BEAR ASSAULT UNIT** · 03-12-2010, 02:11 AM

I believe a 3G network is how mobile phones connect to the internet.

**Loot** · 03-12-2010, 02:05 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Metal Mario

If the four gay persons were gay women, and hot, then that would be enough to convince me to get the 4G network.

Thank you for admitting to being a chauvinist pig.

03-10-2010, 04:02 PM	#8
Luigiman7 ヽ(◔ ◡ ◔)ノ.･ﾟ*｡･+☆ Join Date: Jul 2006 Location: ~)´◡｀(~ Gender: Posts: 17,605 Thanks: 1,134 Thanked 1,012 Times in 713 Posts Blog Entries: 8	GIGABYTE __________________ ／人◕ ‿‿ ◕人＼ＷＯＮ’Ｔ　ＹＯＵ　ＢＥＣＯＭＥ　Ａ　ＭＡＧＩＣＡＬ　ＧＩＲＬ？

03-10-2010, 10:54 PM	#14
Deku Trii PP&R Mod Current Events Mod Join Date: Jun 2000 Location: Texas Gender: Posts: 9,031 Thanks: 521 Thanked 1,099 Times in 583 Posts	Weird how that link doesn't talk about what came before 2G: the original generation, which was developed in Compton,CA and was known as OG. Last edited by Deku Trii; 03-11-2010 at 09:31 AM.

03-10-2010, 12:27 PM	#2
Deku Trii PP&R Mod Current Events Mod Join Date: Jun 2000 Location: Texas Gender: Posts: 9,031 Thanks: 521 Thanked 1,099 Times in 583 Posts	I could explain most of that, but it would take a while to type up since I'm posting from my phone.

03-10-2010, 02:21 PM	#4
Metal Mario Veteran Member Join Date: Dec 1999 Gender: Posts: 16,435 Thanks: 72 Thanked 190 Times in 127 Posts	^Not a joke. And I thank you for your explanations, as they have served to clarify at least some things. (I'd still like to know what a "G" is, though.)

03-10-2010, 02:45 PM	#6
Metal Man Fairy-Slaying Maniac Join Date: Apr 2000 Location: 1592 Miles Away From Here Gender: Posts: 18,062 Thanks: 148 Thanked 683 Times in 482 Posts	G = Generation. But it's not very important anyway. Despite my techno-literacy, phones are literally the least important devices to me. I don't want some high-powered wallet destroyer when I can do more with a computer for less money.

03-10-2010, 04:52 PM	#9
PONIES Senior Member Join Date: Dec 2008 Location: Griffon village Gender: Posts: 2,508 Thanks: 680 Thanked 54 Times in 45 Posts Blog Entries: 9	I'm pretty sure "G" refers to Generation... I remember hearing it called Generation somewhere...

03-10-2010, 08:24 PM	#11
Vapor Senior Member Join Date: Oct 2005 Location: WHERE IT'S AT Gender: Posts: 5,211 Thanks: 314 Thanked 413 Times in 249 Posts	this is adorable "G" means " 1 gram"

03-10-2010, 10:35 PM	#12
Rainbow Dash been dreamin', i've been waitin' Join Date: Jan 2001 Location: a bomb-ass cloud house bachelorette pad Gender: Posts: 24,402 Thanks: 173 Thanked 1,179 Times in 716 Posts	G actually is the universal gravitational constant g is 1 gram

03-10-2010, 10:45 PM	#13
Robotazy PRESS ANY KEY TO PANIC! Join Date: Sep 2000 Location: A Tiny Shed Gender: Posts: 16,483 Thanks: 529 Thanked 1,254 Times in 897 Posts Blog Entries: 46	dude that ad is a year old. we're totally taking pictures, playing video games, and going on the internet with our phones Also, G's

03-11-2010, 01:30 AM	#15
Lurch1982 Senior Member Join Date: May 2000 Location: DenCo Gender: Posts: 9,850 Thanks: 127 Thanked 365 Times in 192 Posts	3G = 3rd Generation. Its a wireless standard, basically saying the device has to be able to do certain things at certain speeds. Mainly indicates the higher download/upload speeds and the ability to do data/voice simultaneously. A similar but not quite the same example is a/b/g/n WiFi designations. Really though, 3G/4G is mostly marketing speak in the commercials.

03-11-2010, 08:41 AM	#16
*Cosmonautical* Join Date: Aug 2002 Location: I rub my tilde all over your asterisk Gender: Posts: 28,102 Thanks: 2,157 Thanked 5,338 Times in 2,433 Posts	4G: Sound it out. Obviously, it's an orgy between 4 persons. Also, the G is for Gay. It's a 4-person gay orgy.

03-11-2010, 09:24 AM	#17
Metal Mario Veteran Member Join Date: Dec 1999 Gender: Posts: 16,435 Thanks: 72 Thanked 190 Times in 127 Posts	If the four gay persons were gay women, and hot, then that would be enough to convince me to get the 4G network.

03-11-2010, 11:13 AM	#18
X-3 Useful as an Owl Join Date: Jan 2004 Gender: Posts: 15,947 Thanks: 753 Thanked 1,213 Times in 790 Posts Blog Entries: 10	Nope. You get Lemonparty+.

03-12-2010, 02:11 AM	#19
LASER BEAR ASSAULT UNIT Videos Mod Join Date: Apr 2006 Location: In my pants Gender: Posts: 4,613 Thanks: 2,502 Thanked 767 Times in 422 Posts	I believe a 3G network is how mobile phones connect to the internet.