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47 Movies for 2017

Posted: Thu Jan 05, 2017 5:46 pm
by Calamity Panfan
Let's do this y'all. Gonna do a better job at tracking things this year.

1. Bee Movie (Simon Smith & Steve Hickner, 2007) - January 2 - D
2. Dog Eat Dog (Paul Schrader, 2016) - January 3 - D-

Bee Movie I checked out because of its meme status. It was worse than I expected, because I didn't expect the accusations of Bee Cultural Appropriation, the comparison of bees to actual black slaves, and I'm pretty sure there's an HIV joke in it. What the **** is this movie?

I checked out Dog Eat Dog because it stars Nicolas Cage and Willem Dafoe, and of course I'm going to check out a movie that stars those two. It starts off with a really well-shot, intriguing (disturbing) scene that sets up the movie as a black comedy crime exploitation movie. It ended up being just a really boring crime movie that I turned off halfway through. Maybe it got interesting again at the end but I couldn't be bothered.

Posted: Thu Jan 05, 2017 10:47 pm
by CaptHayfever
Alrighty, then.

Movies: 2/47

Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles [1990] (1 Jan): A
La La Land (3 Jan): A. That was just gorgeous.

And remember, "I'm-a Luigi, number one!"

Posted: Tue Jan 10, 2017 10:29 am
by CaptHayfever
Movies: 4/47

The BFG (8 Jan): A-. I never read the book, but this was wonderful.
Angus, Thongs, & Perfect Snogging (9 Jan): C+. I did read some of the book, & this film totally lacks its charm.

And remember, "I'm-a Luigi, number one!"

Posted: Tue Jan 10, 2017 1:57 pm
by Calamity Panfan
1. Bee Movie (Simon Smith & Steve Hickner, 2007) - January 2 - D
2. Dog Eat Dog (Paul Schrader, 2016) - January 3 - D-
3. Rogue One: A Star Wars Story (Gareth Edwards, 2016) - January 6 - A
4. The Trust (Alex & Benjamin Brewer, 2016) - January 7 - F
5. Swiss Army Man (Dan Kwain & Daniel Scheinert, 2016) - January 7 - B-
6. The Shallows (Jaume Collet-Serra) - January 7 - C
7. Speed (Jan de Bont, 1994) - January 7 - C+
8. 10 Cloverfield Lane (Dan Trachtenberg, 2016) - January 7 - B+

Rogue One is still dope on a second viewing. The Trust reeled me in with Nicolas Cage and Elijah Wood in the same movie but it ended up being a pointless movie. Swiss Army Man is fun in parts and kinda lame in others. The Shallows is a generic as hell shark movie. Speed is dumb fun. 10 Cloverfield Lane is really good but I wasn't as into the last half hour-ish of the movie.

Posted: Sat Jan 21, 2017 8:48 pm
by CaptHayfever
Movies: 7/47

Wreck-It Ralph (14 Jan): A. Second-best video game movie ever.
She's the Man (17 Jan): A-
The Pacifier (20 Jan): C+

And remember, "I'm-a Luigi, number one!"

Posted: Sun Jan 22, 2017 4:34 am
by Heroine of the Dragon
Pete's Dragon (I leaked... bah!!!) :D

Posted: Mon Jan 30, 2017 3:44 am
by CaptHayfever
Movies: 12/47

Finding Dory (forgot date): A-. Solid follow-up.
How to Be Single (24 Jan): C-. The cast is about 95% comedians, but the movie is about 5% comedy.
Big Fat Liar (27 Jan): A
Wish I Was Here (28 Jan): B+. Drags somewhat, but touching.
Love, Rosie (29 Jan): C. Exceptionally average.

And remember, "I'm-a Luigi, number one!"

Posted: Mon Jan 30, 2017 9:58 am
by ScottyMcGee
Hm, I don't think I've ever posted in the movie thread so here we go:

(I've been on a Jackie Chan movie spree lately)

1. Police Story: A-, Jackie's second best to Legend of the Drunken Master. Memorable final fight. Top notch score.
2. Police Story 2: B+, good follow up, albeit one dumb plot twist
3. Crime Story: B, pretty good, just some plotholes and general questions like "Why didn't the bad guy do X, Y, or Z?"
4. Dragon Fist: C+, meh
5. Magnificent Bodyguards: D, haha okay, this started out cool but then the low budget production really began to show as I noticed strings holding up props and people left and right. They also shamelessly ripped John Williams' score to Star Wars. Yes. Imagine that for a moment - kung fu masters fighting to the tune of the Rebel Alliance. The plot had something going but the twist at the end was utterly stupid and didn't make ANY sense. ANY sense.
6. The Protector: B-, a solid mediocre martial arts/cop film. Some bad guys were thrown in who had nothing to do with the main story.
7. Rumble in the Bronx: B, ending was too abrupt, some character relationships were also abrupt. Also SO MUCH BASS. WHAT THE ****? LOWER THE BASS FOR GOD'S SAKE.
8. The Founder: A-, great flick about unveiling Ray Kroc's lies and deception about creating McDonald's.
9. The Fisher King: A, fantastic
10. The Secret Life of Walter Mitty: B+, some usual tropes

Posted: Sun Feb 05, 2017 5:48 pm
by Heroine of the Dragon
Wreck-It Ralph :D

Posted: Mon Feb 06, 2017 12:45 am
by CaptHayfever
Movies: 14/47

Pete's Dragon [2016] (4 Feb): B+. Pete & Elliot work great, but the film just takes so dang long to wind up! The score is annoying, too; though I like the "Something Wild" song.
Return to Nim's Island (5 Feb): B-. So, Bindi Irwin can actually kinda act. Pity that she spends most of the film playing off of really irritating supporting characters.

And remember, "I'm-a Luigi, number one!"

Posted: Mon Feb 06, 2017 1:30 am
by Heroine of the Dragon
The Addams Family :D

Posted: Sun Feb 12, 2017 8:55 pm
by Heroine of the Dragon
Aladdin :D

Posted: Sun Feb 12, 2017 10:22 pm
by CaptHayfever
Movies: 16/47

Ghostbusters [2016] (11 Feb): B+. The lazy 3-D crap was ruined the immersion repeatedly*, & what AI said elsewhere about the editing was spot-on. But the script was actually solid, there were a lot of great gags, & the performances were there (even Jones's!). Whoever cut together the trailers for this movie needs to be fired immediately.
Valentine's Day (12 Feb): C-. The first of Garry Marshall's holiday movies is also the best, but that ain't sayin' much.

*Seriously, though, you'd think that for the NON-3D disc release of the movie, they'd cut off the unbelievably distracting letterbox-breaking effects.

And remember, "I'm-a Luigi, number one!"

Posted: Mon Feb 13, 2017 12:27 pm
by ScottyMcGee
1. Police Story: A-, Jackie's second best to Legend of the Drunken Master. Memorable final fight. Top notch score.
2. Police Story 2: B+, good follow up, albeit one dumb plot twist
3. Crime Story: B, pretty good, just some plotholes and general questions like "Why didn't the bad guy do X, Y, or Z?"
4. Dragon Fist: C+, meh
5. Magnificent Bodyguards: D, haha okay, this started out cool but then the low budget production really began to show as I noticed strings holding up props and people left and right. They also shamelessly ripped John Williams' score to Star Wars. Yes. Imagine that for a moment - kung fu masters fighting to the tune of the Rebel Alliance. The plot had something going but the twist at the end was utterly stupid and didn't make ANY sense. ANY sense.
6. The Protector: B-, a solid mediocre martial arts/cop film. Some bad guys were thrown in who had nothing to do with the main story.
7. Rumble in the Bronx: B, ending was too abrupt, some character relationships were also abrupt. Also SO MUCH BASS. WHAT THE ****? LOWER THE BASS FOR GOD'S SAKE.
8. The Founder: A-, great flick about unveiling Ray Kroc's lies and deception about creating McDonald's.
9. The Fisher King: A, fantastic!
10. The Secret Life of Walter Mitty: B+, some usual tropes
11. Batman v. Superman: Dawn of Justice: D+, second time watching it. I think we all know what's wrong with it
12. Suicide Squad: C, also second time, basically a step up from Batman V. Superman: Dawn of Justice
13. Inferno: C+, blah blah blah Dan Brown blah blah

Posted: Tue Feb 21, 2017 6:08 pm
by CaptHayfever
Movies: 17/47

Jurassic World (19 Feb): A-. Worlds of fun.

And remember, "I'm-a Luigi, number one!"

Posted: Fri Feb 24, 2017 2:40 pm
by ScottyMcGee
1. Police Story: A-, Jackie's second best to Legend of the Drunken Master. Memorable final fight. Top notch score.
2. Police Story 2: B+, good follow up, albeit one dumb plot twist
3. Crime Story: B, pretty good, just some plotholes and general questions like "Why didn't the bad guy do X, Y, or Z?"
4. Dragon Fist: C+, meh
5. Magnificent Bodyguards: D, haha okay, this started out cool but then the low budget production really began to show as I noticed strings holding up props and people left and right. They also shamelessly ripped John Williams' score to Star Wars. Yes. Imagine that for a moment - kung fu masters fighting to the tune of the Rebel Alliance. The plot had something going but the twist at the end was utterly stupid and didn't make ANY sense. ANY sense.
6. The Protector: B-, a solid mediocre martial arts/cop film. Some bad guys were thrown in who had nothing to do with the main story.
7. Rumble in the Bronx: B, ending was too abrupt, some character relationships were also abrupt. Also SO MUCH BASS. WHAT THE ****? LOWER THE BASS FOR GOD'S SAKE.
8. The Founder: A-, great flick about unveiling Ray Kroc's lies and deception about creating McDonald's.
9. The Fisher King: A, fantastic!
10. The Secret Life of Walter Mitty: B+, some usual tropes
11. Batman v. Superman: Dawn of Justice: D+, second time watching it. I think we all know what's wrong with it
12. Suicide Squad: C, also second time, basically a step up from Batman V. Superman: Dawn of Justice
13. Inferno: C+, blah blah blah Dan Brown blah blah

14. Spirited Away: A-, never saw it before
15. Zardoz: Not applicable, this movie is special. There is no way to rate this movie, IMO. It's practically performance art. I really don't know how to rate it. Sure it's a **** weird-ass movie but is it "bad"? I really don't know. I just. . .I just don't know.

Posted: Sun Feb 26, 2017 1:47 am
by Heroine of the Dragon
The Princess Bride :D

Posted: Thu Mar 02, 2017 1:30 am
by Booyakasha
^^'Man. 'Zardoz'. Like what the heck do you even say. Like...it's 'Zardoz', man. I'd sooner try to critique Zardoz itself. The movie is that weird.

Posted: Thu Mar 02, 2017 1:31 am
by Heroine of the Dragon
The Spiderwick Chronicles :D

Posted: Fri Mar 03, 2017 1:36 pm
by CaptHayfever
Movies: 19/47

Snakes on a Plane (2 Mar): A
Matilda (3 Mar): A

And remember, "Enough is enough! I've-a had it with these monkey-fighting snakes on this Monday-to-Friday plane!"